Not 4 eyes, but 8 eyes

Work is super busy.

Hey, we have a house! We'll be living in a 3-bedroom, ground-floor unit at the Vinings in South Carolina starting September 1. It's great to have that settled, but boy is there alot to do before then.

I bought Cash his third pair of new glasses in the last 2 months today. The first pair was Medicaid-approved and broke almost immediately. The second pair I bought online for cheap and they don't fit quite right. Today, we ended up with new sturdy glasses for $225. At least they had better be sturdy.

Lots of learning

Cash is at the Early Learning Center today - he's having some full days at daycare so that he can have time interacting with other kids this summer. He was clearly interested in the toys, but had to put on a show about me leaving. He whimpered the whole 30 minutes I was there. His teacher Casey was great, though, and I know he'll be fine.

Talked with Karla Kuban today about the Wild West Show. It sounds great - I hope it's a fabulous success! Also, this weekend Ann Larson from the Snowmass Sun took our photo for the newspaper and Cash got a new western-style vest. While we were in Snowmass, we looked at the Ice Age mammoth bones they found there last fall. Cash was very cute running around the discovery center.

The last two nights he has fallen asleep with his head resting on me. I love the way he feels and smells.

We're Wild

I just finished being interviewed by the Snowmass Sun for an article about the Wild West Show. Woo! It really sounds like a great event - there will be a Pioneer Village with craftsmen, a heritage show, and music. I think this event is a great fit for Change for Cash - Cash is a little cowboy, of course, what with his horseback riding. This is just such an amazingly kind thing for Jim Snyder to do. I feel so much gratitude!

Very happy, actually

Wow, I just noticed my posts have been a little dark lately, which is weird because I've actually been in a very good mood! Cash is doing wonderfully, stuff has calmed down with Josh, and I'm excited about the move. I think I've been trying to tackle more serious subjects in the blog, which is fine, but it doesn't really reflect that we are enjoying the summer alot.

So!

Challenges

This morning Cash looked in the mirror and pointed to his nose. It was very cute. He also signed "sleepy" this weekend, but I can't get him to repeat it.

We had dinner with Ariana last night. Cash started out shy, but by the end he was giving her flirty smiles. He is spending a couple nights with Gran and Pop this weekend while I go to Vail to see Ali and Keri (my best friends from when I was 12). G and P had better watch out because Cash is a terror these days - zooming around, into everything, demanding attention.

Ariana told me something that creeped me out. She mentioned someone who reportedly said she doesn't hang out with me because she "thinks it would be sad for Stephanie to hang out with normal kids". Yikes. That just feels gross to me. While I certainly sometimes struggle with being sad about Cash, hanging out with my friends makes me happy. The comment freaked me out because I wonder if other people think the same thing, and really I don't think it is about me, I think it is about their own comfort level. Cash and I are not pitiful. If seeing him makes you uncomfortable or feel sorry for us, then that's really about you, not us. Everyone has challenges - ours is maybe particularly sad, or maybe not. Is it really sadder than people who face degenerative illness, people who lose a spouse or a child, people who can't find a job? We're actually fine and mostly happy. Just like everyone else.

Ooh

A wonderful opportunity has come our way - Jim Snyder of the Snowmass Rodeo has offered to donate the proceeds of Snowmass's Wild West Show to Change for Cash! The Wild West Show will be July 9th and 10th at the Rodeo Grounds, and it sounds like tons of fun. I'm particularly charmed because of course Cash likes horseback riding, and so I think he'll enjoy the whole scene. We're trying to find a cowboy hat for him.

This is so kind and generous of Jim. It just feels to me like a little miracle that came out of nowhere...

Reality

There was this little girl who came by my office yesterday with her mom, who is a member of the summer staff. She's probably about 2 and she was very cute. It struck me as I talked with them how different Cash is - I mean, I KNOW he's slow and his behavior is autistic-y, but I usually just deal with him as he is. This was one of those moments that I didn't have my guard up and got surprised by how normal kids act. It sucks. It makes me sad, even as I am so happy for his recent progress. He's been doing amazing new things lately, but he's still my funny little guy. I wish ... oh, I wish ... but there's not point in wishing. I've just got to deal.

In a happier vein, I nearly ate Cash up yesterday with kisses. He is delicious.